It's funny that it took us a few weeks to make up our mind, when in reality, I think both of us always knew what we wanted in the end. In our final discussion about it, I said to Kyle, can you see yourself not adopting again, because I don't think it's possible for me not to do this again, he said he felt the same and away we went.
Making this decision, reminds of some prayers I prayed throughout our last adoption and I think it is through His answer that I am able to be so excited to be on this path again, so I'll share some of that with you.
Right after we had begun Jack's adoption process, I had several friends who were pregnant and I noticed that I felt a sense of longing for what they had and that really upset me. I too was going to have a baby, just through a different path, so I began to pray about it. I prayed for months that God would match the desires of my heart to His desires, that I would not experience any desires (specifically a desire to be pregnant) if that is not what He had for me.
God answered those prayers and time went on with Jack's adoption. Then once we had Jack home, I again would start to think about wanting to be pregnant again someday, but was conflicted because I knew that adoption was something I had loved so deeply and wanted to do again. So I again began to pray that God would only give me the desire to add children to our family in the way that He had for us. I also began to pray that He would remove any desire to be pregnant, if that was never to be in my future again. God answered those prayers and it made it so much easier to know what path to take, I knew if I never was pregnant again that was fine with me, but it was not okay with me to never adopt again.
We are on step one of a hundred, so there's not too much to tell, but I will keep everyone posted and you can always comment and ask me questions, if you want to email me and don't have my personal email you can also reach me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
We would love your prayers for God to build our family into the one He desires it to be and that He would bring home the perfect child for our family.