The good and the gooder

Good news: I got an email from my agency and our application has been approved, our file has been sent over to Korea and we now begin a bunch of steps to prepare a file on who we are and then wait for our baby. I spoke with the agency doing our home study and we should be able to get that going really soon. So away we go!

Gooder news: (Yes I know gooder is not a word and typically I hate when I hear grown adults use it, but today it is the right word for this post) Jack does not need any work done by the plastic surgeon at this time. He felt like the holes in Jack's mouth are getting smaller and it would not be worth the risk to do another repair at this time. WooHoo! So Jack is now only having a surgery to put ear tubes in and although he will need general anesthesia, it should be very quick and painless. My stress level has gone down considerably.

Thank you for all your prayers, they really mean the world to me, and help me to be a much calmer person :).

Deep Breath

We had to wait in the dentist's office for 35 minutes before Jack got called back. The longer we waited the more anxious I became, I don't like dentist appointments, I especially don't like dentist appointments for my two year old, I really really don't like dentist appointments for my two year old to check on that spot that I just know is a cavity.

I was wrong, it was a stain, not a cavity. He told me the news and I skipped from the dentist's office as happy as can be. I drove home on a high, I took Jack out of his car seat and we played happily. I went inside to make lunch and suddenly I realized, there's another doctor's appointment today about another surgery. The lightness was replaced with a heaviness, and I started to fear again.

I let it linger for a moment, then rearranged my thinking. Remembered the beautiful day, the great doctors that have done such wonderful things for our son, the fact that this next surgery should be much more minor than the first and remembered to breathe deep. Breathe in, 1,2,3 hold, 1,2,3, breathe out, 1,2,3. Then I ate a quesadilla and felt much better. God will be handling all of my and Jack's problems and He doesn't need my help. Deep breath, Jenny, and don't forget about that chocolate you've got in the kitchen.

A day as supermom

I have five children right now. Yes, you heard me correctly, five! children. We walked outside this morning and my neighbor said, wow! y'all sure to multiply quickly! It's true, we've multiplied and it was quick. But not to worry, I haven't taken you out of the loop of news in my life, it's only temporary. My sweet friends are taking a weekend for themselves and we are keeping their three children for them.

I decided to just go for it and see what it'd be like to be a supermom for a few hours and go out and enjoy this beautiful day. So off to the ChickFilA we went, I did some math in my head to see the cheapest way to feed these kids and still get enough food, ordered it all, and drove over to a local park to eat and play.

That was when it got fun, half the kids ran off to play on the playground and half sat down to eat. And since it was such a beautiful day the playground was crawling with kiddos. So I began to divide up the food and began the counting, 1, 2, 3,...4,...where's number 5, has anyone seen Kylynn, oh there she is, 5. And soon I'd be counting again. But after a few minutes things seem to get easier, OK, it actually only got easier because several friends were there and they helped me despite there own children that needed taking care of.

It was actually really fun and it did make me feel like one of those super-organized moms that can have 7 kids and still find time to make their own granola and sew matching shirts for everyone. You know the ones always smiling, who never yell at their kids. That was me today, I mean more than half these kids are not actually mine, so I was able to keep my smile on and avoid yelling, of course there was no granola or sewing going on, not even in cooking for that matter.

We have more adventure planned for the weekend and so far these kids are great, I'm thinking of swapping out some of mine for some of theirs when their parents return...think they'll notice?

A conversation with Kylynn

"Mommy, can we bring home a baby girl this time," Kylynn asked me the other day. "Honey, I'm sorry it's probably going to be another little boy," I told her.

Tears, real tears, fell down, "but I want a sister." What can I say to that, it broke my heart, I consider my sisters to be the most important relationship I'll ever have, I want her to have a sister too. "I know honey, I'm sorry, but they just need more families for boys than girls. But you know what, God can do anything, so if you want a sister you pray for a sister but, I'll pray for God to bring us our perfect child."

"Ok, but I'm going to just pray for a sister."

And we did that day. The agency tells us that we don't qualify for requesting a little girl, so we are officially in the "either" category, but that category is actually the equivalent to a "boy" category, but I know that God can answer big prayers in whatever way He wants, and I'm excited to see what happens.

This morning on the way to school, "mommy, can we adopt a baby with blonde hair?" I smiled, "Kylynn we're adopting a baby from Korea, what do babies in Korea look like?" "I don't know," she said. Bigger smile, "Honey, Jack is from Korea, what color hair does he have?" "Black," she said. "That's right, black, so our baby will have black hair, because people from Korea have black hair," I told her. "OK," she sighed.

It's really neat doing this again, when Kylynn is so much older, she really understands what's going on and really wants her say in what happens :).

Prayer request for Jack

Would y'all say a quick prayer for Jack. He is going to have tubes put into his ears again, and I'm praying that God would work out the details for him to be able to have some work done on his mouth at the same time.

Pray that his plastic surgeon is available for a surgery date, soon! The ENT doesn't want Jack to have to wait for tubes because of the negative effect his ears are having on his hearing and speech. Also pray that the audiologist would be available that same day for a hearing test that can only be done when under anesthesia. In summary, that God would work out all the details for the surgeries to coincide and He would guide these doctors as they operate on him again.

Thank you for your prayers. My Jack would not be who he is today were not for all of you praying on his behalf.

Let's add a baby...

We have come to a decision, and we've decided to add a new baby to our family through....... adoption! Something tells me not many of you are surprised. We began our paperwork and are working with Holt International again, we really enjoyed our experience with them last time, so we really feel comfortable starting another adoption through them. We are also going to adopt from South Korea again, at least that's the plan for now, we are always open to God shaking up our nice little plan and putting His in place instead.

It's funny that it took us a few weeks to make up our mind, when in reality, I think both of us always knew what we wanted in the end. In our final discussion about it, I said to Kyle, can you see yourself not adopting again, because I don't think it's possible for me not to do this again, he said he felt the same and away we went.

Making this decision, reminds of some prayers I prayed throughout our last adoption and I think it is through His answer that I am able to be so excited to be on this path again, so I'll share some of that with you.

Right after we had begun Jack's adoption process, I had several friends who were pregnant and I noticed that I felt a sense of longing for what they had and that really upset me. I too was going to have a baby, just through a different path, so I began to pray about it. I prayed for months that God would match the desires of my heart to His desires, that I would not experience any desires (specifically a desire to be pregnant) if that is not what He had for me.

God answered those prayers and time went on with Jack's adoption. Then once we had Jack home, I again would start to think about wanting to be pregnant again someday, but was conflicted because I knew that adoption was something I had loved so deeply and wanted to do again. So I again began to pray that God would only give me the desire to add children to our family in the way that He had for us. I also began to pray that He would remove any desire to be pregnant, if that was never to be in my future again. God answered those prayers and it made it so much easier to know what path to take, I knew if I never was pregnant again that was fine with me, but it was not okay with me to never adopt again.

We are on step one of a hundred, so there's not too much to tell, but I will keep everyone posted and you can always comment and ask me questions, if you want to email me and don't have my personal email you can also reach me at achosenchildblog@gmail.com.

We would love your prayers for God to build our family into the one He desires it to be and that He would bring home the perfect child for our family.

Happy Easter

I hope you all had a joy filled Easter. That you were able to celebrate life, the new life we have in Jesus Christ, remembering that on that day, death was defeated. The battle was won and that makes me want to celebrate.

*Speaking of new life...we have an announcement, but I'll save it for tomorrow..see you then :)