I've finally gotten my butt in gear and have been getting the paperwork needed for the home study done. I spent this morning getting some forms signed by the kids' doctor, that ended up sending me on a wild goose chase to correct Jack's medical records and locate Kylynn's. Let's just say there is a bit too much bureaucracy at Scott and White, but the people are really very helpful and a supervisor spent most of her day making phone calls on my behalf and then updating me on our progress.
I've gotten almost everything done, I still need to get the questionnaires to two of our four references, fill out a sheet on our household budget, and have a check-up/blood work for Kyle and I, but the appointment at least has been made. (If you want to pray for me, please pray I don't pass out while having my blood drawn, remember the fainting goats post).
All that to say in two weeks I should have everything complete and mailed into our agency, so that they can send out a worker to do another home study on us. And to say, I'm tired. I don't remember it being this hard last time around.
It's starting to become real to me, as I fill out each paper, I carve a little bit more space in my heart for this new baby. My thoughts turn to him more and more and I've started remembering to pray for him (timing is of course something that always changes, but most likely the birth mom is pregnant with our child right now).
It's a scary and awesome place to stand, the beginning of a journey, not knowing what twists and turns the path will take, and I'm remembering how life changing this one is. I'm looking forward to the journey as much as to the end result, to the stretching of my faith, to the lessons learned, and most of all to the times when I stop and draw near to God and rest in Him and awe at this wonder of adoption that He created and allowed me to walk in.