Sunday, April 26, 2009
Look Mom, hands!
I am a week late in updating y'all on Jack. Jack was given permission to take his arm bands off, he is still only allowed to eat soft foods and cannot have anything to play with that he could possibly get to the roof of his mouth, but certainly this is better. He was so excited to take the arm bands off, he spent about 5 minutes just looking at his hands and arms and moving them around as if to say, "Look Mom, I've got new hands!" I can never tell you how much your prayers and support for Jack and the rest of us during his surgery means to me, but I'll try :)
After just one week of the arm bands, my nerves were really starting to fray. Jack had been fussy, a lot. And since he is one, he cannot tell me what exactly is wrong, did he hurt if so where (he had a few surgeries at once) or is he uncomfortable, hungry (he wasn't eating great), tired (he wasn't sleeping great)? It was a Thursday morning and I was driving Kylynn to "school" at our church. And I was doing everything in my power to keep it together, I was sleep deprived, and Jack had had another fussy morning. I remember driving and saying something to the affect of, "God, help me. I cannot handle this. I'm losing it right now and I can't lose it at Kylynn's school."
I walked into our church and hear my pastor calling my name, he comes over to see how Jack is doing and tell me he's been praying for us (I had no idea he knew about the surgery), then one after another people came up to me to tell me they've been praying for us, I had never told these people about Jack's surgery, and I was overcome with a peace and gratitude. God answered my prayer so perfectly right when I needed it. He reminded me that I am not alone, that all these people love Jack and me and our praying his protection over us. Your prayers have literally kept me from losing it :)!
It won't be the last time God has to remind me to trust Him, to allow Him to have control, to give my troubles back to Him and stop carrying them around myself. But hopefully my faith and trust is growing as I watch Him carry me through another trial.
We are now focusing on Jack's size, he is quite small for his age and I am working with a nutritionist and a speech therapist to help him grow and learn to use his new mouth. The poor thing has gotten 3 or 4 new teeth in the last week, including molars, so he's still not feeling great, but this too shall pass. He has actually embraced some more solid foods much quicker than I anticipated, God again is answering my prayers in big ways. He's eaten refried beans, mashed potatoes, several cereals, pieces of sandwiches, and some string cheese. This is a big deal for me and I am praising God for this.
He is such a blessing to us. I have got to feel that complete joy again this week as he's begun taking his first steps!